99. The Eagles - Hotel California (Asylum Records, 1976)

“Come on, man, I’ve had a rough night, and I hate the fucking Eagles, man" - El Duderito

Formed by members of Linda Ronstadt's band, the Eagles were the first and possibly only band to have two Dons. This might explain why the main thing I think about of when I think of them is distance. Every time they'd appear on TOTP2, they'd be as far away from the Top of the Pops Studio as possible, on some big specially-constructed stage, stood miles apart from one another. When they broke up, their last album, a live one, was mixed across the breadth of America on two coasts, as the band members would only communicate with each other through their lawyers. The biggest distance of all however was the distance between me and the meaning of The Eagles.

I find it impossible to listen to the title track of Hotel California. I mean I've played it to myself numerous times on headphones, as free from distraction as possible, but there is nothing there to hear. The rest of the record, my god. It's spacious, for sure. Light on anything resembling a statement. Light generally. Linda Ronstadt sounds almost too heavy after this.

Positives. It has that nice plush 70s production where the drums sound like Air's “How Does It Make You Feel?” a lot. Slide guitars are nice. “Life In The Fast Lane” is alright, Steppenwolf kinda vibes. Joe Walsh is largely responsible. He's the only Eagle who's given me any pleasure. Listening to his solo song “Life's Been Good”, where he talks ironically about the hardships of millionairedom succeeds where Ringo Starr tries and fails, and it made a nine-year-old me and my seven-year-old sister burst out laughing in the back of the family Polo with his couplet “I go to parties, sometimes until four / It's hard to leave when you can't find the door”. I don't think either of us knew at the time why he couldn't find the door.

Talking of staying too long at a party, let's talk temporality here. Now this album came out after The Ramones first album. Blondie's first album. Patti Smith's. We're nearly a year after Station To Station. One would certainly expect country-rock (I think that's the genre here, though I do feel it's an abbreviation of soft country-soft rock) to be a bit more backward looking, but this was Easy Rider done seven years late. It certainly provides a soft refuge for people afraid of modernity.

What Kind Of Splash Did It Make?

This album is the first indicator that sales might be important on the Apple 100 List, and boy does this release have them. Twenty-six times RIAA Platinum. Fuck a duck. Even crazier, their greatest hits album, imaginatively titled Their Greatest Hits, a pre-“Hotel California” release was the first platinum certified album, and went RIAA Platinum 38 times, meaning an American sale (whatever those are across a forty-eight-year timespan) for every ten Americans? Fuck, and suck, a duck. Sales aside, I'd say that the enduring impact of The Eagles was the amorphous yet immediately recognisable thing of drivetime, in which a man says: “It's time to put the pedal to the metal, baby. Quick, put on the slowest, lightest shit ever!”. It probably did wonderful things for the consumption of peyote. It probably helped the Red Hot Chili Peppers crystallize their fascination with California as a word, a refuge and a way of life, ushering in their slide toward irrelevance, even though Flea is in the movie that the quote leading this review comes from. The Eagles also gave us Snow Patrol, whose breakout single “Spitting Games” is just The Eagles “Peaceful Easy Feeling” with an indie makeover. Thanks for that.

Where To Go From Here?

Away from this website. Fine. Desparado is better. Their Greatest Hits is better. If you do find yourself liking The Eagles, do a search for “drivetime” and good things will happen for you.